There was an interesting article in the Sunday Dallas Morning News titled “Tips on being a better parent”. One of them really put into words what Hubby & I believe. We’ve followed a loose version of attachment parenting with all of our kiddos. We really didn’t even know the term existed – we were just doing what felt right for our family. Here’s the part that caught my eye:
“All babies cry. Just close the door and let them cry it out. This is a tough world. Somebody isn’t going to come running every time you squawk. The sooner kids learn that, the better off they’ll be.”
Yes, the world can be tough. But it’s also full of caring people. And the sooner a child feels safe and cared for, the more likely that child will be a happy, caring adult.
“You hear people say, ‘Don’t pick that baby up. It just wants attention.’ Yes! That’s exactly what it wants and needs,” Dawn said. “It says to the child, ‘I’m valuable.’ “
You can read the entire article here.
I get comments all the time on how close our kids are to each other, how calm our home life is, their level of confidence, their willingness to share. (Don’t get me wrong, we have the usual bickering & noise level that goes with 4 kids, but they genuinely adore each other’s company)
I believe with all my heart that this is the result of the way we chose to raise them. The way little children see their parents (especially Dad) is usually the way they view God. I want them to see Him the way I do – as a loving Father who is always there, comforting me when I’m scared, holding me when I’m upset, lovingly disciplining me when I need it.
Parenting is such a personalized thing, not a one-size-fits-all. I think every family should do what works for them & make no apologies. I remember when my older ones were babies & being made to feel like we were doing something wrong as parents by not letting our kids cry it out. That probably works great for some families, but not for ours. I want to encourage you to go with your gut, no matter what “label” your parenting style might earn you.
Not too long ago our 4 year old Little Prince went and got in his bed all by himself. (He usually falls asleep on the couch with Daddy or in his big sisters’ room.) Ten minutes later he came into the living room & climbed into Hubby’s lap. Snuggling his head into his Daddy’s chest he said, “This is better.” Hubby kissed him on the top of the head and said, “I think so too.”
(Just wanted to clarify: I’m not in any way, shape, or form saying that our way of parenting is the only or best way. It’s just the best for us. I just want to encourage every family to find what is best for you & stand by your convictions when the comments come your way – because they will come, no matter what style you choose :o)